Mindfulness and Self-Compassion
Life can be stressful. Whether it's in your study, work or personal life, sometimes it can be difficult to keep on top of everything.
But by understanding how our brains work and our own personal thinking habits and mental strengths and weaknesses it can be possible to implement strategies to not only manage stress but also live happier and more fulfilling lives.
Recently we sat down with psychologist and University of Canberra Honorary Appointee Marie Bloomfield to learn more about mindfulness and self-compassion, as well as some tips and strategies to help us become more present in our lives and better handle stress.
An ancient brain in a modern world
In many different ways humans are not evolved for our modern way of living. From sitting down at desks all day, eating certain foods and even our sleeping patterns we live very different lives from our hunter gatherer ancestors.
Modern living though doesn't just affect our bodies. Our brains also evolved to live in a very different world and this can sometimes affect our mental health.
"We've got this very complex brain which has what we call a negative thinking scan and bias" explains Marie Bloomfield.
This scan and bias constantly looks at our situation and surroundings for what is dangerous and threatening.
"Thousands of years ago that was a really good attribute because it helped us to stay alive, but today we don't live in such a dangerous world."
Today of course we live in a much safer world. We don't have a constant threat of being attacked, or the need to search for food and shelter. However our negative scan still exists, despite living in a much safer and secure world our brain continues to search for what is dangerous and threatening.
Becoming aware of your thinking
While our natural negative scan was once an advantage and helped to keep us alive, today this negative thinking can be not only unhelpful but unhealthy.
"We've got this good brain that helped us to survive, but it wasn't a brain that was here to make us happy. This is something we need to learn, how to be happy with this brain that tends to see things negatively."
There are however techniques to help not only recognise this negative thinking, but consciously re-orient our minds to think in a more positive way. This awareness of our own thinking is known as mindfulness. By becoming more mindful we are able to bring awareness to our thinking and reactions to events in our lives, seeing the reality of a situation rather than simply reacting instinctively and negatively.
"With mindfulness we can step back, become aware, and recognise that it's natural to see the negative first and ask ourselves 'what's right?'."
Using awareness to make positive changes
Becoming aware of our thoughts and reactions is only the first part of making positive changes to our thinking. Self-compassion is how we use this awareness to pay attention to and attend to ourselves.
"Mindfulness is being aware, its choiceless, you're just being aware of what is. But self-compassion is the quality that we put into this awareness."
During stressful times the use of mindfulness and self-compassion techniques can help to reduce the stress response to bring about clearer thinking.
"During the stress response we use a primitive part of our brain which thinks about things narrowly. It can be irrational at times, it uses black and white thinking and accelerates things. When using self-compassion you can access higher functions in the brain.
So if we can reduce our stress response then we can access the rest of our brain which have a much broader perspective which are much better in terms of problem solving."
By becoming more mindful and self-compassionate we can help to bring balance to our lives and make the most of what is around us. Self-compassion also allows us to not only attend to our own needs, but other's as well, and care for ourselves in a way which is strengthening.
Becoming more mindful
"Your moment of power, your moment of being able to change and to rewire you mind is in the now, in this moment and then the next moment. "
By becoming more mindful we can recognise the times when our minds are working on autopilot, and become more aware and present in a situation. Through this awareness we can also critically analyse thoughts and decide whether they are accurate and helpful.
There are both formal and informal practices can help you to become more mindful and present and can include simply becoming more mindful during everyday tasks. Below are some simple techniques and practices which can help to make you stop, and become more present in the moment.
"Anything that makes you slow down a bit will help you to be more present. It's about coming into your body and being more present at that time. Give your head a break, come into your body and see things how they are. Experience life as it is".
Self-compassion techniques to help reduce stress
During stressful situations there are many different techniques which can be used to help feel relaxed and reduce your natural stress response. Marie has two practices which can help to bring about confidence and de-stressing which you can feel in a physical way.
Next time you are hugging someone or shaking their hand, take a few seconds to notice and savour the feeling. How does it feel in your body? There's usually a sense of softening, softening in the shoulders and chest.
By becoming aware of these feelings you can consciously trigger them during stressful times to help have a moment of relaxation.
Having pictures of loved close by- such as on your desk at work or around the home- can also provide relief during stressful moments. By simply looking the pictures for even a few seconds you can feel a sense of relief.
If you would like to learn more about mindfulness and self-compassion you can read Marie's blog at Mindful Path Canberra. Marie also conducts a range of mindfulness courses for those wishing to become more mindful and develop self-compassion in their daily life.
Words and illustrations by Daniel Murphy.